Site icon The Niagara Reporter

Niagara Falls jokes

Much to his chagrin, Mayor Dyster arrived at his City Hall office to find that it had been invaded by mice, and complained to Seth Piccirillo about it. Piccirillo thought for a moment, and suggested, “Why don’t you offer to pay off their student loans?”

***

An Englishman, a Frenchman and a Niagara Falls resident are looking at a painting of Adam and Eve frolicking in the Garden of Eden. “Look at their reserve, their calm,” muses the Brit. “They must be British.” “Nonsense,” the Frenchman disagrees, “They’re naked, and so beautiful. Clearly, they’re French.” “No way!” the Niagaran points out, “They have only an apple to eat, and they are being told they live in a paradise. Obviously, they live in Niagara Falls.”

***

A man parked his car in Mayor Paul Dyster’s parking space next to City Hall. A policeman rushed to him, shouting, “Are you crazy? Mayor Dyster parks here!”

“No problem,” the man answered, “My car has a good alarm system.”

***

Gov. Cuomo visited a pig farm on the Southern Tier and was photographed there. In a newspaper’s office, a discussion got under way as to what should be the caption under the picture.

“Gov. Cuomo among pigs,” “Gov. Cuomo and pigs,” “Pigs around Gov. Cuomo,” – all are rejected. Finally the editor makes the decision. The caption is “Third from left – Gov. Cuomo.”

***

Mayor Dyster summoned City Administrator Nick Melson to his office and said, “I know you’ve been spreading jokes about me. It’s impertinent.”

“What are you talking about?” pleaded Melson.

“I am the Mayor of this city, leading its economic renewal, restoring hope and confidence in our future.”

“No,” Melson hesitatingly replied, “I’ve not told anybody that joke.”

Exit mobile version