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This Week in Stupid Crime

By Mike Hudson


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City police arrested William "Ankey" Dussett, 37, on numerous charges late last week after an alert citizen witnessed the repeat offender breaking into a vehicle on Niagara Avenue.

Dussett, an unemployed black male who lives on Ninth Street, was positively identified by the witness as the man seen rifling through cars in the area. Police searched him and came up with $7.19 in change and a Tag Hauer watch, still in the box, identified as belonging the owner of one of the cars.

Dussett was taken to the police station and booked for petty larceny and possession of stolen property. Police also discovered he was wanted on a previous warrant charging him with another count of petty larceny and one of criminal trespass.

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Mucinex heist reported

Jeffery S. Eberhard, 49, of Grand Island is a strapping man, 6' 2" in height. He tips the scales at 320 pounds. He is also, as are most of the people named in this column, unemployed.

Eberhard was apparently feeling poorly last week so he stopped off at the Tops Friendly Market on Portage Road in search of relief. He removed three packages of Mucinex Maximum Strength pills from the shelf, opened them, put the pills into his pocket and returned the packaging.

Store security witnessed the whole thing. They detained Eberhard until police arrived. The total value of the medicine was $41.97. Eberhard was booked on shoplifting charges.

We here at This Week In Stupid Crime have always thought Mucinex to be one of the most horribly named mass market products available today. In fact, no matter how well it works, we wouldn't take it just because of the name.

But apparently it does have its fans.

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Shoplifter eludes capture

It was just after 6 o'clock in the evening, outside the Target store on Niagara Falls Boulevard. Two Niagara Falls Police officers were walking their beat, freezing, probably wishing they were somewhere else, when suddenly a man burst out of the store like somebody was chasing him.

It turned out somebody was chasing him-the store manager. The store manager told the cops the man was fleeing from Target after attempting to steal a shopping cart full of items that had not been paid for.

The suspect sprinted towards Taco Bell as the officers called in backup. The cops lost sight of him, but were approached by a concerned citizen who said she saw the suspect get into a vehicle and flee the scene.

The suspect was described as a white male, about 5' 11", with short brown hair and glasses. He was wearing a blue button down shirt underneath a black leather jacket and dark blue jeans, police said.

The value of the clothes, toys and other items he attempted to steal was $627. Nothing was missing or damaged and everything was returned to the store.

Officers then circulated a still photo of the suspect from the video surveillance tape through Wal-Mart, the Hobby Lobby and other stores in the area to warn employees and customers of the potential shoplifter.

 

 

 

Niagara Falls Reporter - Publisher Frank Parlato Jr. www.niagarafallsreporter.com

Feb 18, 2014