Mayor Paul Dyster and DPW Director Dave Kinney just announced their new snow removal plan. It's called April.
Mayor Dyster set December 18 for his city hall Christmas party. Maria Brown, Ruby Pulliam and Donna Owens are drawing straws to see who wears the Grinch costume.
Paul Dyster finally admitted why his budget was 37 days late, his dog ate it. The mayor doesn't have a dog.
Always willing to try innovative techniques to get more out of his employees, Dyster has made a move to keep all the men at city hall on their toes...he raised the urinals.
Now that his top department heads have shunned him, Dyster is so desperate for conversation that he's actually speaking to Donna Owens.
Three is a charm. First Dyster had trash inspectors with no ordinance to enforce. Now he's got an ordinance with no trash inspectors to enforce it.
The mayor was so touched at the thought of city employees losing their jobs in the 2015 budget that he almost shed a tear.
City hall insiders say that Dyster is now considering hazard pay for everyone that has to work with the city Controller.
How is the Niagara Falls city budget like the Chinese culture? They've both been described as an enigma wrapped in a riddle inside a contradiction.
There is absolutely no truth to the rumor that things are getting strange inside the Dyster administration. "Jonathan," the mayor's imaginary friend, issued a statement saying, "Everything at city hall is just honky dory!"
Heard at city hall: "As mayor I have a real problem with the council telling me how to misuse casino cash. I'll be the judge of how to misuse casino cash!"
Help is on the way. Mayor Dyster has contacted Albany. He's asking the state to "restructure" his snow removal plan.